“Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.”—Margaret Atwood.
Let me preface this that I am not speaking about all men. There are quite a few wonderful men in my life, so I know that this is NOT all men. Please read that again, NOT ALL MEN.
As I was reading about the latest school shooting, (God, it kills me to have to use the words latest school shooting) I read that one of the first people that this alleged Monster (I will not write his real name) was his ex-girlfriend and then that he killed another girl who had not wanted to date him. (LINK)
Which brings me to the point of today’s blog. Women do not owe men anything and men do not owe women anything either.
Almost every woman/girl I know has had an experience with a man who thought they were owed something. I have had several experiences in my life that where this has happened to me. I went on a first date with a man who offered to pay for my dinner. I had taken money to pay for my own meal, but when we were leaving dinner and we’re supposed to be going to a movie, he wanted me to follow him back to his house for sex. I have been told repeatedly that I am innocent, but I will say I was taken aback.
I told the man that I was not going back to his house and he proceeded to call me every nasty name you can think of. I threw money at him, told him to fuck himself and I ran to my car. I was afraid to go home because I didn’t want him to know where I lived, so I drove around for a while and I went into the diner in my hometown because I knew the owner and he let me hang out there until closing time and he followed me home to make sure I was safe. I thank God, that I had a friend I could rely on.
When I was in my late teens, I went on a few dates with a guy I had gone to school with, it wasn’t anything serious. Just two people hanging out, playing video games and doing normal teenage stuff. I was at his parent’s house, his sister and her boyfriend were there also. We were just hanging out listening to music and this guy wanted me to have sex with him. I was a virgin at the time, and I wasn’t ready to have sex. He tried getting me to go into his bedroom and I wouldn’t go. He left the living room for a few minutes and came back with a gun and he said I was going to have sex with him. I am so glad his sister was there. She literally grabbed me by the hand, dragging me out of the house and she took me home. That guy was seriously disturbed and I have heard he has spent time in jail. As I think back to the times that this has happened to me, I am lucky to be alive.
I grew up in a town where everyone had pickup trucks with gun racks and there were always guns in those racks because hunting is really big around there and still is. I have friends who have decided that my point of view on guns is a reason to hate me and I am okay with that. My beliefs don’t have to be the same as everyone else, but when you think your rights outweigh my rights then we have a problem.
I lost a person I considered a friend because he believes that he has a say in what I do in my life. He isn’t my husband, but just an old (ex)friend. Friends can give their opinions on what I am doing in my life, but when a friend thinks they get a say in the final decision, that is no longer a friendship, but a toxic person to be around. I have no idea why he would think he could make decisions concerning my hair, my piercings and other decisions in my life. I discuss big decisions with dear hubby and my bestie, but it’s ultimately my decision.
It doesn’t help that we have a president that treats women like meat. Some men, including our president, need to remember that women are people too. It is time that women are treated as equal.
Men and women if you see a friend/co-worker/brother/random man on the street treating women the way the president treats women I implore you to say something. Stand up for your fellow women.
Writing this blog has been cathartic in a way, but also brought up things that I have never told another soul. I talked to my mum tonight and told her something that happened to me repeatedly over the years because I didn’t know how to get out of the situation I found myself in. I just feel like I need a long hot shower to clean the ick off myself.
I pray that one day in the near future, women will be treated differently. Men and women need to be treated as equal and no one owes anything to another person unless terms are agreed upon beforehand. What is happening to this world?
I’m sorry to start Monday off on such a horrible subject. Mawow and I hope you have a great day and we will see you back here on Wednesday.
Mawow and I wish you,
Peace, Love, & Kitty Snuggles.
I would like finish with a Facebook Post by the Police Chief of Houston. As a Texan this shooting hit me hard. I agree with every word the police chief wrote.