LIVING MINDFULLY

Good Morning Y’all!

TGIF! I am glad that it is Friday, I plan on spending a lot of time writing and getting my Camp NaNo project caught up. I have gotten behind this week. I have been dealing with a lot of pain. For those who don’t know, I live with a chronic disorder that causes me to live in pain 24/7 and for some reason, I cannot get my pain under control. I don’t see my doctor for another two weeks, but I may have to make an appointment with my family doctor to see what can be done. My only other choice is to go to the hospital to see if they can help and that is the last thing I want to do. So, this won’t be a long post, but I wanted to write something for a Friday post.

This post kind of goes along with my last post about kindness. Just as I left the women at the gym get to me, there are millions of women who suffer from some sort of self-esteem issues or body dysmorphia or depression or anxiety. I suffer from all of the above. I am seeing someone for the depression and anxiety, but the dysmorphia and self-esteem some days I think I am doing alright and then the next day my self-esteem is so low I can barely look at myself in the mirror. My cousin made a post on one of her social media accounts (you know who you are, thank you) that got me thinking about writing this post.

We women really need to stop trying to tear each other down and start lifting each other up. Those women at the gym hurt my feelings and yesterday when I was getting cleaned up, I found myself tearing myself down. I was agreeing with those women, but dear hubby and my friends set me straight. I am not an ugly person and I may be overweight, but I am doing something about it. I wish everyone could see me through Mawow’s eyes. He loves me and my hair. He is forever trying to sniff and play with my hair.

When I was younger, the only thing that I thought about was having a boyfriend, friends and having the best “stuff.” I thought if I had the best boyfriend, best friends, and the best stuff, I would be on top of the world. I didn’t realize when I got older that having a boyfriend, friends, and stuff wasn’t what would matter when I reached 48. Yes, I’m getting up there in age, but I am okay with it.

I didn’t marry the boyfriend from high school, in fact, I have been married twice and I love my husband, but I have learned that we women need to have a bit of independence so we aren’t withering on the vine. I have only a handful of friends from high school. I moved away from my hometown and most of my friends live here in Texas, Florida or in Colorado. As for the stuff, yes having nice stuff is great, but the older I get the more I am ready to minimalize. I have clothes in the closet to not see them for three months. If I don’t wear them within three months they will be donated to Good Will. I have only taken one thing out of the clothes in almost two months. I see people really reducing their carbon footprint and I am well on my way to doing that for us.

My priorities have changed a lot in the past year. I am focusing more on what makes me happy. I am living mindfully and I have found that it is the correct path for me. Instead of setting long-term goals, I focus on weekly goals, which I find much easier to do. I can reach my weekly goals and I am happy every time I can cross a goal off my list.

One of my weekly goals is to lift up the people around me. Each time I sit down to meditate, I pick three or four people and I lift them up in my meditation. When I go out, I try to compliment someone and to do it meaningfully. Not just a random compliment that I don’t mean. If someone has a beautiful smile I tell them. If someone has great hair, I tell them. I tell my friends and family that I love them all the time. We are not guaranteed tomorrow and isn’t it better to tell those around us why we love them? We don’t know everything that our friends and family go through each day, so why not try to lift them up? I hide my pain/depression/anxiety pretty well. Most people don’t realize when I am in pain. You have to be around me a lot to be able to see the pain. Nothing makes me feel love more than when someone realizes I am in pain and asks me if they can help me with whatever it is that I happen to be doing.

Our country has become a country of hate and it makes me sad that I have had to block people on my social media. I have had to block family and friends alike. I write my blog for myself and I publish it on my website because I like to share what I write and I have had friends and family think I am writing to hurt them. I don’t want to hurt anyone, but I write for me. I write what I think I should write about. I have had people who I love write some downright hateful things that were intended to hurt me. When someone who is supposed to love and care about me writes hateful things on social media, I have to block or mute them because taking care of myself mentally and physically is important. Which is the reason I wrote this rambling blog. We need to take care of ourselves in this world of hate. I hope that whoever becomes our next president takes the time to help people heal from this administration.

Just know that you are enough! There is no shame in getting help for your own issues. I am so glad that I finally did it. Try to lift up yourself and those around you. We can make this world a better place. You may be the only one in someone’s life to say something nice to them. We don’t know what our friends and family members go through every day. We don’t need to impress anyone but ourselves. Make yourself happy, do whatever it is you need to do to make you happy. See the happiness in front of you right now, that is how you live mindfully.

I’m sorry this is a bit long, but it just started coming out of me, so I guess this is what needed to be said. I hope you have a wonderful weekend and I will see you back here on Monday.

Mawow and I wish you,

Peace, Love, & Kitty Snuggles

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